By Pam Wright
Local Journalism Initiative Reporter
Myles Casey Benson Neuts loved deeply in his 10 years on earth, with Newfoundland dogs and sports cars on his list of favourite things.
His parents Mike and Brenda Neuts discovered two of their thoughtful son’s wishes upon reading his journal following the boy’s shocking death 25 years ago in a bullying incident at the former St. Agnes School in Chatham.
The incident, which became the subject of an intense police investigation and a coroner’s inquest, occurred on Feb. 6, 1998. An unconscious Myles was discovered hanging by his shirt collar and a necklace on a hook on the back of a door in a washroom stall.
He died after he was removed from life support six days later.
The family’s pain was raw and all encompassing.
“We couldn’t bring ourselves to read the journal until a couple of months later,” Mike said in a recent interview with The Chatham Voice. “We found out he wanted us to rescue another big, black Newfoundlander. His other wish was for his mother to get a sports car and drive him to school with the top down.”
The couple has done their best to honour Myles’ wishes. They are on their fourth Newfoundland rescue pup and they also bought a Pontiac Solstice for Brenda to drive.
“It’s kind of our way of keeping a promise to Myles,” Mike explained.
But the couple has honoured their beloved firstborn in a much larger way. Mike began telling Myles’ story at area schools. In 2005, Mike and Brenda founded the Make Children Better Now charity. The acronym for the non-profit aligns with Myles’ initials.
For more than two decades, Mike has carried his son’s story out into the world, bringing its anti-bullying message to more than 200,000 children across Canada.
He’s received nearly 20,000 letters and cards from children and teens detailing how Myles’ story touched them, with some saying Mike’s message stopped them from taking their own lives.
MCBN has expanded and grown. Experts, including university professors, lawyers and accountants, have pitched in, with scores of other volunteers stepping up to help with fundraising.
The charity’s list of accomplishments is long. It includes bursaries, donations to local projects and causes, with an estimated $125,000 having been dispersed.
Members also founded a ground-breaking children’s program called Respect Revolution. The musical group travels to schools and venues, delivering an anti-bullying message in song.
MCBN also sponsored the development of the Henkel Hook to be used in schools that gives way when the weight on it exceeds 26 pounds.
Several major events regarding police and children’s mental health have also been held in Chatham-Kent as a result of Myles’ story, including the first international symposium for police on the subject of young children in conflict with the law, with a focus on interviewing and profiling.
Neither Mike nor Brenda ever dreamed of the powerful reach their son’s story would have.
“It’s unbelievable,” said Brenda. “When it first happened, I didn’t think 25 years could ever come.”
She said the first 15 years after Myles’ death were devoted to raising his brother Dane, who was six when Myles died.
“All our concentration was on Dane,” she added. “He had his own goals.”
Dane, now 31, managed to achieve many of the things he set out to do. He became a chef and lived and worked in Australia and New Zealand for a few years before putting down roots in Banff, Alta.
Back on track after being derailed by the COVID-19 pandemic, Mike is again taking Myles’ story on the road and is heading to Montreal next week to speak at a school.
He’s looking forward to the lift it gives him.
“I get my batteries charged when I speak to kids and with activities such as the Respect Revolution, which promotes dignity, respect and love,” he said. “When I’m in the schools, I get that same kind of value returned to me. I’m in my strength. Where does that strength come from? Maybe there’s a little angel sitting on my shoulder.”
Neuts said he’s been told by more than one of the children he’s engaged with that Myles is present in the room when he talks, with some saying Myles is surrounded by a “green aura.”
Green was Myles’ favourite colour, Mike said.
No definitive answers or conclusions were ever reached regarding how Myles came to be hanging on a bathroom door. The police had no grounds to lay charges against the two boys said to be involved in the incident, and the inquest’s ruling was undetermined. The inquest did, however, make 24 recommendations the couple continues to push for. Thirteen have been accomplished to date.
Mike plans on continuing his advocacy work and speaking to youth. But he also has advice for adults when they relate to kids.
“You need to ask them how things are going and really listen,” he said. “That can make a huge difference.”
Mike said he realizes that Myles death hit everyone hard, not just his own family.
“It happened in school and that’s not supposed to happen,” Mike said. “It didn’t just slap us; it slapped the whole community. It was a terrible case of bullying gone wrong.”
Operating with a board of directors MCBN welcomes new members. Fees are $10 the first year and $5 annually thereafter. For more information, you can access the organization’s website or e-mail mike.neuts@sympatico.ca.
